I Like That Chimps Can Now Play Rock Paper Scissors

Japan has been ascending for a while now in terms of technology. Now it seems that they are about to corner the ever growing market that is teaching chimps to be able to play rock, paper, scissors. Great job America. Way to let this booming industry slip right through your finger tips. I understand that you’re busy trying to avert war with North Korea and are figuring out how to avoid a civil war at home, but you’re really going to rue the day that you didn’t beginning teaching chimps how to settle bets by using the only game you need to settle a bet.

I think it’s a very good thing to have chimps learn how to settle conflicts by using rock, paper, scissors as long as they don’t teach them about throwing out atomic bombs or anything else that’s not rock, paper and scissors. There is nothing else to throw out and anyone who does throw anything out is some kind of loser jerk. Also, it’s important that they thoroughly explain to the chimps that both chimps involved in playing need to be on the same page and that it’s really uncool to be a chimp that tries to cheat by throwing out their selection immediately after the other chimp throws theirs out. Explain to the chimps that it’s very obvious to catch a chimp doing that. They need to also teach the chimps that they have to say shoot after saying rock, paper, scissors. That’s crucial. My biggest question is this; are they teaching these chimps that it’s always best out 2 out of 3? Only thing worse than someone cheating in rock, paper, scissors is someone that believes that they won the game after they win the first game. That’s total garbage. You might be the worst person going if you think you won after winning the first game. I can’t count how many times I’ve won arguments or avoided doing something I didn’t want too do being down 1-0 only to come back and throw two rocks and pull off the upset. So I’m asking you Japan, please make sure you teach them that. Thanks



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