I Respect Trump’s Spiritual Advisor Who Wants You To Send Her A Month’s Worth Of Pay Or Else

People The results, White claimed, are “miraculous” — whether her followers sow a month’s pay, a week’s pay, or a day’s pay. “First Fruits has impacted my life personally and the lives of countless others!” she wrote. “First Fruits is more than just an offering … it’s a principle.”A donation shopping cart is set up on White’s website, with all money appearing to go directly to Paula White Ministries  — her company that helps helm her TV show, Paula White Today (among other things).“When you sow a First Fruits Offering of $75 or more, I will rush to you the book, the devotional and also a Paula White 2018 wall calendar! Track throughout the entire year prioritizing God with me!” it says on her website.The results, White claimed, are “miraculous” — whether her followers sow a month’s pay, a week’s pay, or a day’s pay. “First Fruits has impacted my life personally and the lives of countless others!” she wrote. “First Fruits is more than just an offering … it’s a principle.”A donation shopping cart is set up on White’s website, with all money appearing to go directly to Paula White Ministries  — her company that helps helm her TV show, Paula White Today (among other things).“When you sow a First Fruits Offering of $75 or more, I will rush to you the book, the devotional and also a Paula White 2018 wall calendar! Track throughout the entire year prioritizing God with me!” it says on her website.Not giving will breed serious repercussions, White said, including unnamed “struggle[s].”“God lays claim to all firsts. So when you keep for yourself something that belongs to God you are desecrating what is to be consecrated to God,”  White warned.

Full disclosure; I’m not thrilled with how the Trump presidency has been besides that most of what he says and does ends up being hilariously false, incorrect and ridiculous. Will he possibly get people blown up by a nuclear bomb? Maybe, but I believe in laughing as much as you can and he delivers every day. But something I love more than laughing is a good scam and this Paula White, who’s Trump’s spiritual advisor, telling people to send HER their January monthly pay to her so that they don’t feel the wrath of God is fantastic and I hate that I don’t get a taste of it. Especially when you lay down the ground rules of how the Almighty decides who to smite and who to let into the kingdom of Heaven

“When you honor this principle it provides the foundation and structure for God’s blessings and promises in your life, it unlocks deep dimensions of spiritual truths that literally transform your life! When you apply this everything comes in divine alignment for His plan and promises for you. When you don’t honor it, whether through ignorance or direct disobedience there are consequences.”

Well there you have it. Like they did in Egypt, as long as you surround your sarcophagus with gold, you’re a no brainer to hang out with the likes of Moses, Mother Theresa and Wolverine. As long as you pay it forward, you’re fine. Obviously the best part about any good oiled scam is that dumb people will undoubtedly fall for it and send their money to this spiritual advisor. No les than 2/3rds of the south probably mailed a shoe box with all the money they made so far this year with the biggest smile on their faces. Meanwhile, spiritual advisor White is sitting there going ka’ching ka’ching, like a cash register. Such an awesome thing to be part of a good scam. Hopefully one day I can get brought in on a scam. That’ll be a good day.

PS- Must be really somethin to be so rich or the president and have an advisor for spirituality. When you’re that rich or president of a nation, you probably can get an advisor for anything. I’d love to have an advisor on wings. Like a person who can get me wings whenever I feel like it. That’s the advisor for me.

@2ndSatSports

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